Limericks Of Goosebumps
by SideshowJazz1
Summary: All 62 Goosebumps books from the original series, each condensed into a limerick, because vampires, ghosts and werewolves always make good poetry subjects, you know. R&R!


**A/N: Hi! Well, I decided that as long as I felt like it, I should write limericks based on every book in the original series. So here they are – every single book from the original Goosebumps series in the form of a limerick.**

**Disclaimer: As usual, every story is the property of RL Stine. All I own is the limericks I wrote about them.**

**Welcome To Dead House**

The house may be pretty and big

But the Benson kids don't give a fig

It's so creepy, they say

And without light of day

They'll die by the town's need to drink

**Stay Out of the Basement**

Don't ever come down here, he says

But his behaviour puts the kids on edge

They must sneak down to find

Plants he's trying to hide

And their clone father's more than a hedge

**Monster Blood**

Stuck at his great-aunt's all this summer

He thinks it's just a total bummer

Then he finds some blood

Comes from monsters, that crud

And it grows – it makes this the worst summer.

**Say Cheese and Die!**

Four kids find a camera – that's cool!

But using it means Greg's a fool

The future is there

In the pictures – beware

Now Shari's gone – those kids are tools

**The Curse Of The Mummy's Tomb**

Egypt is a cool place to visit

But there's something not right that's with it

Don't look for a mummy

Their caskets ain't funny

It's just lucky Gabe's luck makes them quit it

**Let's Get Invisible!**

A light and a mirror – so what?

When you pull the light's string, it's a lot

You can turn the light on

And it seems like you're gone

But the mirror's getting pretty hot...

**Night Of The Living Dummy**

A girl finds a cool but dumped dummy

When she gives him a voice, she gets money

Her twin sister gets one

But her act's not so fun

And they're causing some trouble – not funny

**The Girl Who Cried Monster**

A girl with some great monster tales

"But this one is real!" she wails

But she's told one too many

When he kills, she's not ready

She'll have to escape without fail

**Welcome To Camp Nightmare**

Camp isn't as fun as it sounds

Though there's lots of cool kids on the grounds

But when campers go missing

There's totally something

Wrong, but can reasons be found?

**The Ghost Next Door**

There's a ghost in this boring small town

And this ghost is feeling very down

Doesn't know that she's dead

Thought it was in her head

She must save a boy's life, like, right now!

**The Haunted Mask**

Being a scaredy-cat is never fun

For once, she won't be the scared one

When she puts on her mask

What's that face for, you ask?

It's her real face now, so just run!

**Be Careful What You Wish For..**

After helping someone find her way

She suggests three wishes as pay

But Sam words them wrong

All the world's people's gone

It really was the worst of days

**Piano Lessons Can Be Murder**

A piano is in their new home

So why not have lessons, now it's owned

Jerry's hands are in danger

His teacher's ever stranger

To quit lessons, he should've just phoned

**The Werewolf of Fever Swamp**

Swamp fever runs rampant 'round here

But that's not the main problem there

There are howls in the night

And attacks, sounds of fights

It's a werewolf who's gone everywhere!

**You Can't Scare Me!**

To scare a girl who's scared of nothing

Her belief in monsters could be something

When the mud rises up

It seems her time is up

But it scares them instead – that's the thing

**One Day At Horrorland**

They're on their way to a theme park

They think Horrorland is a lark

Things start to get hairy

When rides get all scary

Pinch, then run outta the park!

**Why I'm Afraid Of Bees**

Honey and bees hated by Lutz

Like his life, because he's such a klutz

A vacation from life

Could take out his strife

But a bee is worse, though not a klutz

**Monster Blood II**

Using Monster Blood is a no-go.

But Evan kept wanting to show

When Andy's in town

Turns a scowl to a frown

When she uses it without his know'

**Deep Trouble**

The ocean is such a great place

With a ship and your uncle as base

Then the mermaid shows up

And they capture her, but,

They lie and let her leave the place

**The Scarecrow Walks At Midnight**

A farmhand with these superstitions

Give grandparents their inhibitions

Jodie wonders why

Then she looks past the sky

The scarecrows are breaking tradition!

**Go Eat Worms!**

Cutting worms in half is a pastime

But murder is still a crime

When Todd goes too far

His sis scares him afar

And he does something else to pass time

**Ghost Beach**

Sadlers of the past haunt the beach

But for death, one pair is out of reach

Yes, their graves have been dug

But it's not them, they shrug

Well it is, just stay off of the beach

**Return Of the Mummy**

It's a new year, a new holiday

But the mummies are still there, they say

An Egyptian princess

Isn't so powerless

When she brings her bro back – he's okay

**Phantom Of The Auditorium**

The Drama Club's got a project

But someone wants Zeke to eject

Tricks get him kicked out

Stuff he knows not about

Seems the Phantom felt like a reject

**Attack Of The Mutant**

Comic books are totally cool

But they're not accurate, as a rule

A building with a feel

Makes the Masked Mutant real

And Skipper's an ink-bleeding tool

**My Hairiest Adventure**

A tube of expired spray-tan

Is hoped to get this band a fan

But all that is growing

Coarse hair that starts showing

The experiments on dogs get a ban

**A Night In Terror Tower**

A visit to the Tower of Terror

It won't make their lives any better

They're the prince and princess

Sent forward in time, I guess

And their backstory they can't remember

**The Cuckoo Clock Of Doom**

To get his brat sister in trouble

Michael twists the bird's head on the double

It takes him back in time

And life becomes sublime

His sis won't exist, so no trouble

**Monster Blood III**

Babysitting your cuz is a drag

'Specially when your aunt is a hag

Use the Monster Blood? No -

You ingest it, you grow

And we've got this sequel in the bag!

**It Came From Beneath The Sink!**

A sponge that can breathe and has eyes

Brings Kat's family a surprise

It's evil to the core

Brings bad luck, that's for sure

But when someone likes that, it soon dies

**Night of The Living Dummy II**

The ventriloquist's story, take two

But this time, it's not just the blues

Ruined carpets and walls

Slappy's rise and his fall

You've got one living dummy, buy two

**The Barking Ghost**

Why does no one else see the dogs?

They lead these two kids through the fog

Bodies stolen, life gone

Parents get something wrong

Is a chipmunk's life worse than a dog's?

**The Horror at Camp Jellyjam**

A loose trailer endangers sibs

But they land at a sports camp for kids

When the winners walk on

Counselors say they're gone

It's the story of Goosebumps ad-libs!

**Revenge of the Lawn Gnomes**

A dad with a thing for kitsch lawns

Finds gnomes have made trouble each dawn

Neighbour's in a mean mood

Cause of that little dude

It's a dog's whistle he should have worn!

**A Shocker On Shock Street**

A movie lot tour sounds like fun

To Shock Street the tour ride will run

But it seems way too real

That's the way the kids feel

But they shouldn't feel – that's how they're run!

**The Haunted Mask II**

Been a year since the worst Halloween

A new mask wanted by a teen

Looks like an old crone

Who's not dying alone

He's aged quite a lot from thirteen!

**The Headless Ghost**

The tale of a boy with no head

And a house where the story is said

Now where does the head lie?

Is that place where he died?

It was found and he's grateful, I read

**The Abominable Snowman Of Pasadena**

Two kids that get caught in the snow

Find a myth and a legend below

Bring him back to the sun

And his ice weighs a ton

When his magical snowballs they throw

**How I Got My Shrunken Head**

The jungle is hot, wet, yet cool

At least, that's Mark's thoughts as a rule

He hears news that's tragic

He'll use newfound magic

To survive, and prove he's not a fool

**Night of the Living Dummy III**

Several dummies are stowed in the attic

Cause one dad's a dummy fanatic

Then things start going wrong

From the shelf, Rocky's gone

But it's really the new one, so pack it

**Bad Hare Day**

A magician who snaps "Beat it, kid"

Well, his trick box he should have just hid

Carrot makes girl a bunny

This kid knows it's not funny

He should never have lifted the lid.

**Egg Monsters From Mars**

An egg hunt uncovers this thing

From its planet, it just took wing

Scientist wants to study

Makes the finder his buddy

Is protected by miles of the thing

**The Beast From The East**

Weird forests are never good news

From the creatures, the kids take their cues

They don't know this new game

But the monsters are tame

When they think that these kids are pros – phew!

**Say Cheese and Die – Again!**

When a teacher says "this is a fake"

Greg proves that he's more than a flake

Finds camera, with a spin

He's bloated, Shari's thin

And the teacher won't let him retake

**Ghost Camp**

Yeah, all the kids like to play jokes

The boys think that it's all a hoax

But they're really all dead

And to get out, they said

They needed those boys as their hosts

**How To Kill A Monster**

Left alone in their grandparents' house

What they let out is more than a mouse

Monster runs all around

They think their fate is bound

To this pachyderm, they are the mouse

**Legend Of The Lost Legend**

Looking for a strange story that's lost

They have no idea of the cost

Find it, no harm done

Then the givers must run

Forever now, people are lost

**Attack Of The Jack o' Lanterns**

Two snobs who should get a good scare

For Halloween, couldn't prepare

They must trick-or-treat fast

This time it's not a blast

Turns out aliens just aren't that rare

**Vampire Breath**

Turns out vampires need more than blood

It's a bottled fog that whiffs like crud

Sends the kids back in time

They'll be dead on a dime

But someday the boy will love blood...

**Calling All Creeps!**

If you're a creep, call up Tasha tonight

But the calls go to Ricky, that's right

He can command these Creeps

With the turnabout seeds

In the end, he decides not to fight

**Beware The Snowman**

Jaclyn is haunted by a verse

Then she hears about snow that is cursed

It's a monster that's cold

And a story of old

And freeing him brings out the worst

**How I Learned To Fly**

It's not fair to one-up a kid

But each time, that's what Wilson did

But when Jack learned to fly

He thought he'd reach the sky

But Wilson flew for a town's bid

**Chicken Chicken**

Knock over a witch, freeze in fear

The kids are scared but she doesn't care

Crystal's lips are like leather

Cole starts growing feathers

Lack of manners gave them the worst scare

**Don't Go To Sleep!**

All he wanted was a bigger space

But now it's become a new place

He's become someone new

Doesn't know what to do

Happens every time when he wakes.

**The Blob That Ate Everyone**

The magical power of thought

Makes a blob monster that must be fought

Shut your eyes and just think

In your mind he will sink

It's a blob monster's writings we caught!

**The Curse of Camp Cold Lake**

Drowning seems Sarah's only choice

It's the only way she'll have a voice

But she meets with a ghost

Who wants her as a host

For the afterlife – it's not her choice!

**My Best Friend Is Invisible**

A sci-fi's fan needs a new friend

An invisible boy ties up that end

He's kind of big trouble

Makes our hero's worsts double

It's obvious why he has no friends

**Deep Trouble II**

Talk about the big fish in small pool

The size of those creatures aren't cool

It's a mad marine plan

Now discovered by man

And fish liquid makes Sheena a fool

**The Haunted School**

Voices that come from the walls

An elevator answers calls

Kids in shades of all grey

Something isn't okay

And they need to escape from the walls!

**Werewolf Skin**

Staying with his aunt, that's all right

Alex hears these howls in the night

There's these furs right next door

Comes from werewolves, he's sure

And another werewolf says he's right

**I Live In Your Basement**

Blow to the head? Marco's confused

Keith's message won't make him amused

Can't tell what is real

How does Marco feel?

Keith's human dream makes him bemused.

**Monster Blood IV**

There's something weird in the blue tin

Something bouncy and happy – that's him

But when it drinks water

It's meaner, and more-er

How many can they stuff back in?


End file.
